Category: Let's talk
I'm tired of people telling me negative stuff about my bf Chris. I'm sure Chris is tired of hearing negative stuff that some people say about me! We're both Christians! We've aggreed that we want break up unless we both decide on it!
And the reason why you are announcing this to the entire world is, because ...
hope, I honestly don't think anyone cares what you do with your life, or, at least I don't.
hope, quit creating these bullshit boards will you? I honestly have no problem with you, but come on! all they're doing is clogging up valuable band width. you guys have dragged yourselves through the mud with all your antics, so no wonder people think what they do. so come on, stop already!
Load of Christians break up and cheat, loads of Christians also stay together happy every after, so it's not really an argument either way.
But, agreed with everyone else, I wish you guys best of luck and everything but I really do not care personally whether you are having problems or not. To me there is no real relationship unless you've met the person, a purely online relationship just isn't worth much to me, and I do speak from experience, it just is not the same and it can't be considered serious unless you've met and have future intentions. Of course it all starts online and people involved take it seriously but it appears they are all too eager to share their quick note drama with the rest of the world.
It is true, Hope, being a Christian doesn't have anything to do with how much one enjoys hearing bad things about one's partner, nor does it make it any more or less likely that a couple will break up. Oh, and neither does publicly proclaiming that one will *not* break up--as a matter of fact, this public announcement can appear to be a bit of a desperate attempt to convince oneself of something one doesn't really actually believe anymore. I'm just pointing out the ineffectivity of such a board post, but I do of course wish you all the best.
I don't know who you are and I don't know who Chris is. But I do wonder why you feel the need to make public declarations, and why you care what other people say if you're so sure of your relationship - if you can call it that considering you haven't actually met?
Oh, and a good many catholic priests are paedophiles, so being a Christian doesn't guarantee anything.
Bahahaha! The last line of post 7 made it golden.
Also, to the original poster... what, exactly does this prove? Nothing. That's what.
I feel the need to point out some things. First, while I don't know the in's and out's of Hope's relationship with Chris, I do know that there is a large majority of zoners who think that on-line relationships are anything but substantial. I also know that the rumor mill increases when two people try and attempt a long distance relationship. What would motovate someone to write such a board? Personally, what I hear from post number 1 is that people are feeding both Hope and Chris a lot of negative information about the other. Publicly Hope has come out and said "I really don't care what you all have to say, and neither does Chris." In my view there is nothing wrong with Publicly stating this fact. It seems to me that there are too many people in Hope and Chris's relationship. Best buddies are cozy like bed buddies in their relationship. This to me is why other zoners keep their relationships from the zone. In the past I seem to remember one relationship, rather more than one relationship which was leaked to the zone, which almost caused that relationship to end. If those of you who don't care about the relationship of these two really didn't care, then why are you taking the time to post about it? Hope has been accused of wanting attension. Funny though that it is her accusers which give her that attension that she is accused of wanting. Why not just skip the board after reading it? I have heard talk of bandwidth, by posting to this board, does that not increase the use of the bandwidth? Really come on, how much bandwidth was used up for these few sentenses for this one board post? I for one don't Hear Jay Squared or Chris N complaining about the board post. How many other useless posts have been posted including some from yours truely? Never have I been told I am taking up bandwidth however. If you don't care then spare the words, the other posts are as meaningless as the first post except to those who are directly affected by it.
Thanks,
Nem
Who wants to start a betting pool on when they'll break up? Maybe 500 points to get a day?
lol. if that was the case, we'd be rich by now.
I can tell this post won't die any time soon, lol.
well put nem. preach it brother! heheheheheh
I give it 2 weeks before those 2 break up. I don't give 2 fucks wether or not they stay together, they break up or whatever. She's an attention whore. She'll deny it til the very end, but the fact that she posted the original message speaks volumes. Tells you everything you need to know.
Okay, while I agree with most of what Nem said, I do have to disagree on one point. While the original post is saying that she doesn't care what people say or think, and that she's not going to let other people influence her relationship with Chris, she's shown in countless other ways that she cares a great deal and has already let others' words affect her. She's shown it by posting this topic, for that matter. There's nothing really wrong with making a post to say you don't care what anyone else says or thinks about something, but by creating such a post, aren't you contradicting yourself? *shrugs* I don't really give a damn about their relationship one way or the other, so I have no interest in debating its success or failure. And I do agree that all the people posting to complain what a pointless and stupid topic this is are just giving it more life and bringing it back to the top, which is kind of silly. And I'm about to do it right now. Lol, cheers.
Chelsea you make me giggle. At 2 in the morning I don't know that I will be able to debate this with you either. I think Hope meant to say she doesn't care to hear what other people are thinking or saying. There is a difference to me between wanting to hear and being affected by what someone says. Hope doesn't want to hear, but seems to be affected by what people are saying, which would bring about this board post. As for ToonHead, I could write a book about you and yours. But you already have by reading your live journal. There really isn't a difference between that and this. If you really don't care, why did you post? Seems like that contradiction that Chelsea was talking about if you ask me.
Nem
PS, and I know you didn't ask me. But I am telling you.
Aha, if I understand you correctly, Nem, then I agree with you. I suppose there is a difference in saying you don't care what people think and not being affected by it, but when most people say they don't care what other people say or think, they mean that it doesn't bother them and they're not affected by it. At least, that's what it's generally taken to mean, as far as I'm aware. Of course, there could be some new shift in communication that I haven't been clued in on yet, and in that case I could be displaying my extreme idiocy while trying to display Hope's, but ... now I'm just rambling and confusing myself even more, so back to the point. If she was indeed saying that she doesn't care what other people have to say and meaning literally that she doesnt care and doesn't want to hear, then I agree that there's nothing really wrong with making a post to state that, except that it's just gotten her more negative opinions than she had before. But if she meant that she doesn't care in the sense that it doesn't affect her one way or the other, then this post is a contradiction and a waste of time and space.
And either way, this debatelet we've had is really kind of irrelevant as far as the actual purpose of this topic is concerned, if it can even be said to have one. Not that it's detracted from anything important. Lol, this is where I shut up.
that was well put, toonhead
Okay, while Hope and Chris are friends of mine, and I think that they have a strong relationship as far as being commited to each other, I have to say that I agree with Cam on this one. Hope, don't take this the wrong way, but by posting this board your only fueling the gossip mill, and creating problems for yourself and Chris. Yes it's frustrating when people get in your business, but creating this only braught more problems for yourself and for Chris. If you wanted people to not talk about your relationship anymore, then posting this board didn't do it. I know that it's hard, but just ignoring people, would have eventually stopped gossip.
agree with Liz
Right so and you wonder why people attack you this is why.
feickin jesus write it in a pm, get it all out, then delete the feickin thing
Stevie
Well, we keep adding to this board, it appeasr to be too much fun to let go.
I wanted to point out, with regards to my earlier post, that by online relationships I am referring to those peeps on here who seem to want to live their rather limited romances out in public notes and boards. Those who claim to be together one day and next week that they are no longer together and some great tragedy happened between them, those people probably never met and had minimal talk outside of the zone and within the Zone, apparently, mostly in quick notes. I do not really call that relationships since it doesn't really touch on any of the hardships of a real long distance relationships where people get up in the middle of the night to talk to the other one, donate hugely to air lines and phone companies and really are committed to try and make a future work together even if they are currently stuck on opposite ends of the world (well, I guess a sphere does not really have opposite ends, but it's a figure of speech).
I never understood the need to display all those love poems and relationships ups and downs on public message boards, to me it seems like the relationship is just a way of getting attention. I do not claim ultimate authority on the issue but in my experience the flashier the love poems and the more people one shows them of to the less chance the relationship has of actually succeeding. There is, of course, the overwhelming need to share your happiness with the world, but there is also just the need to convince yourself and the world that you really are in a relationship or you want people to believe you are cool enough to be in one. It's always hard to say which reason is the cause for public posts about love. In my experience it is usually the latter.
That being said, I'd also like to point out one can post to a topic even if one does not care about it, simply for lack of anything else to do or post to, whatever that says about the life of said person I will not comment on.
Agreed WB. Also, I'd rather keep the things I write and say private because it makes them a little more personal that way, rather than flaunt it too much. I guess people are just different when it comes to how publicly they like to display their effection for one another. The more private, the more personal and special it feels, for me anyway.
Sort of taking this topic in another direction, what is the difference between posting a board, and kissing in public? Arn't both forms of PDA (Public displays of affection)? I know some of us don't like to watch it, as was said on other board topics, but how many of us do it? We never said how many of us publicly display our affections. Shrugs, it's not going away, so lets live with it.
Well, I'd say a virtual kiss on QNs is fine with me, but a board post dedicated to someone's love is like intimate touching in public, possibly topless.
And flaunting one's relationship troubles on a public board, well, doesn't it always make you sort of uncomfortable to watch people fight. Seen it too often, if there is a big party and a couple gets drunk and then they start fighting over something and it turns into a long winded relationship discussion, and everyone's watching .. that is a party pooper right there, I prefer they retire to the bed room for a "quick fix"..
Awwe? yes, it's so good to see people have uh...... "difficulties finally find "love" or something like it?
lol *sarcastic smile*
Cam we didn't start anything! As soon as some people found out we were going together, they told me negative stuff about Chris. When I confronted him I learned none of it was true! That made me fell really dumb! I never had a boyfriend before! I'm a nerd! I only care about God, my family my friends, my pets and an education! Thanks I'm glad to know I've wasted a lot of space with this useless topic! But I could care less, all of us are guilty of it. Liz I think I know what you mean! I shouldn't have created this board to get rid of my anger! Jared I'll bet this relationship want last either! I have a lot to learn! But so far things are going grate!
You're just a confusing person
so if you bet that this relationship won't go far, why be in it? lol
Hope, in your last post, didn't you just point out the contradiction of this board?
I mean, yall arn't going to break up, but the relationship won't last?
*shakes head and walks away.
hope don't let everyone talk you into thinking your relationship won't last. if you let them do that, then it's doomed! So if you want to stay in this relationship, and you think it's real, then don't give in. Just because of the drama on the zone. keep your relationship off the boards, and that's a good start. If you don't feel comfortable in the relationship, then end it, don't just stay in it for the girlfriend status. hehehehe smiles, shea
couldn't have said it better myself, shea.
hae thank you I like your post! i FEEL LIKE GIVING UP ON THIS! tHAT'S WHAT i MEANT! tHERE'S TOO MUCH DRAMA!S
hope. drama is a part of life. In relationships your going to have a bit of drama. your first mistake in this one, was publicising evrything that happens between you guys! In a relationship, it's alright to talk about little things with others. of course your excited about being together and want people to know. to start different bords like this one is a different story! it's just asking for the drama. you may not have ment it that way, but this is life and people are always going to have something to say! this is the public boards after all, which means the public is going to give there opinions! In some instances peoples opinions may help, but in this case there putting pressure on you. You want to know why that's a bad thing. None of us know your personally, i shouldn't say none of us, because i'm not sure who you know and don't. but a good majority of us don't. I'm not trying to be mean. this needs to be said though. if your going to base your feelings in this relationship on drama and what people say on public boards, then maybe your not ready for a real relationship.. i'm not saying that your not for sure. but just from what i see on here, you have a lot of growing up to do as far as relationships go. My advice, as i said before, is keep it off the boards and talk it out between the two of you. Tell him how you feel and then make your decision. don't base it on the drama, or your never going to be happy as a couple!. although they may not all be as drastic as yours, all relationships run into some drama. that's what makes them stronger, knowing you can get through it together!
Shea
couldn't have said it better myself, Shea. thanks for posting that.
Hi Shae, I'll answer your last post! Caus it's the only one worth replying too! I only know 2 Zone members in person! The rest of them are people sitting in front of their keyboards! I know I need to grow up and I'm going to get some flack for it! My mom says I need to grow up all the time! More so sinse my dad died! My brothers and sister say it too! I told Chris that I don't need a boyfriend caus I'm too inmature! He says it doesn't matter! I'm a Christian and that's all that matters to him!
um, okay? While I agree with Shay on her post all the way, cause I've learnt my lesson the hard way, something disterbs me about your last post Hope. If you told Chris that you don't need a boyfriend cause you, yourself kno that your to immature, then why are you dating him? Don't get me wrong, I consider you both friends, but just being a Kristian alone doesn't make a good enough base for a relationship, in my view. I don't want to see either of you hurt, but you can't just have a relationship based on relidgen alone. Specially a boyfriend girlfriend one. That would be like you going out with someone just cause they have a dog the same size as Daisy. Only you kno in your heart if you love Chris, and by love I don't mean just love him cause he's a Kristian. okay, sure, having the same relidgus beliefs is all good, it gives you somewhere to start, but just being with someone for that reason alone, is just asking for questians like the ones you've been getting.
no-one has the right to tell you how to run your relationship, but if you put it out here like this for all to see, it's just asking for problems. I kno some nasty things have been said about your relationship to both of you, and about both of you, and you don't kneed that, given that Chris is your first boyfriend and all. The thing is, (sorry for being so blunt), by posting this board, you didn't stop the gossip, you only fueled it. Hope, I hate to break it to you like this, but what I'm telling you (or trying to tell you), is that all this drama you didn't want, happened cause of this board. Like Shay said, talk it over between the two of you, not the two of you and the rest of the zone. Don't learn your lesson the way I did, you'll only end up with a bad rep like I did, and you shouldn't have to go through that either. I wish I could say that people have stopped talking about me, now that I'm keeping my private life, private, but they haven't, and such is life.
I agree with liz on this! here's another thought. if you get angry about what people say, write your thoughts out on the computer. write a letter to someone, just don't send it! trust me girl, it works! I know it works because I do it all the time! diaries are the best way of getting anger out! and look at it this way. you don't show anyone the diaries or whatever, so no dromma is started. do you understand where I'm coming from? I hope you do Hope, because I'm only trying to help you.
that's what I'm trying to do as well. Probablly shouldn't have been as blunt as I was though.
Suggestion. Stop communicating with Chris via public quick notes, private quick notes and private messages: use AIM, Skype, VT or MSN instead. Call him on the phone, but not using Zone By Phone. Send him emails, but not through the link at the end of his profile. If you two have a problem talk it out on the phone or in person, or write about it and keep it on your hard-drive, a CD or a thumb drive. I.E. end your zone relationship and keep what's left. If you want to be with him, not saying if that's a good, bad or nutral idea, I don't have all of the facts, take it to real life, and keep it off the zone. Problem solved. Believe me there is so much drama here that if given a break from any information from either you or Chris they will find someone else new to attack.
Liz I'm so sorry something bad happened to you here on the Zone! Gillman Girl I usually write letters like that to people in braille and throw them away! Hather I expected something critical from you! But thanks for your helpful advice.
Based on your last few posts hope, is it safe to say that you and Chris have indeed broken up despite your proclaiming that you and he would not break up?
NYM I think you're right! He only calls once a day now, and it's late at night! He calls when I'm sleeping! So yeah you can say that!
Hope, that's a bit rude on his part if he's calling you when your trying to sleep. Doing that to someone who is trying to sleep is not cool at all! If this means the end for you guys, then I'm sorry to here that. If it is, and you need to talk, you know where to find me.
Liz it happened again last night! My mom and sister try to wake me up! But when I've swam all day it's hard to wake me up! I've told him it's over in an email! Greenballoon2000 Melissa says I express my self better by writing! I'll let you know what happens from here on out!
oh my gosh. your really not ready for a relationship. you ended things because he called you? how is he supposed to know your sleep pattern. hell, i'm married and i couldn't tell you every time my husband would be taking a nap or going to bed early. So maybe it's better for chris that you end things! I don't know either of you. but it seems doomed from the beginning! you both need to learn a bit from this so called rrelationship! and grow up before you try again!
Hope, is it only the rest of the World that finds this entire thread some what farcical? We're now getting blow by blow break up details from you about your relationship with Chris, in a topic created by you entitled, (Chris and I aren't going to break up.)
How many more times does it need to be pointed out to you that this sort of thing shouldn't be for public consumption. We don't need to know all this stuff. It just isn't necessary. The reason this topic was created was because you didn't think it right that people kept commenting on your private situation, and yet every time something happens you're straight onto the boards to update everybody. Get a clue woman. If you don't want people talking about you, then stop fueling the fires, and if you do wish for the attention, then stop being disingenuous and claiming that you don't like it.
Dan.
agree with shea, well said
oh my! um, Hope, don't put it up here, just pqn me or something. Shay I don't think it's cause he called her while she was trying to sleep last night that she decided to end it, but if you read back, she said that he did it before as well. Hope obviously had other reasons for ending it the way she did, and maybe she should keep thoes to herself.
Shae no that's not really it! Dan your last post made me laugh! You sounded like a sportscaster on the news! Tonight was the last straw! He freaked out caus I went to the airport with my family! We went to pick up Hayley she returned from France! I told him I was going to the airport! He said why did you go to the airport? I told him I went with my family and I had every right to go! He said he expects me to answer the phone when he calls! I said no one tells me what they expect from me except for my parents! Now that's my dad is gone only my mom has that right! I think Shae's right I know I have a lot of growing up to do!
hope. listen to me! you don't need someone like him in your life! he's abeusive (SP?) and if he's controuling now, what makes you think he'll get better in person? it's just gonna eskilate! now take it like you want. but I have a bad feeling about this!
She's right, the last poster, I mean. If he's telling you that he expects you, and here, I place very heavy emphasis on the word expects, then it would be unwise to meet in person. A relationship is not about controlling someone, and I think he should know that, but I wouldn't be the one to tell him.
At least you realize you have growing up to do hope, that's the first step.
guys, settle down. She's freaked out enough as it is. It's not my place to say what's happened in the mean time, but if Hope wants to, than that's up to her. I will say this though, no-one, and I mean no-one! has the right to even think! that they can control another person's life. We all have brains of our own, and we can all think for ourselves. If the person we think is our bf or gf thinks that they can control us, then they are the ones with the problem.
Thank you Gillman Gal and Liz! I spoke to a friend of mine who has been abused! When she said end it, I went for it! Thank you Jared! I'm glad I took the first step! I'm so mad at my self! I'm mad at Chris too! I don't know why I agreed to be his girlfriend! He wanted me to admit I made a mistake! The only mistake I ever made was agreeing to be his girlfriend!
um, joanne, you didn't tell him directly to grow up, but you did if he ever reads this board. hehehe
This board should be deleted.
Okay first of all I tried to call more times than at night for thoughs that are saying that I called only at night. Second hope I saw no such e-mail so I don't know where you get the idea that you sent me a message saying it is over. The only one I could see it being is the one you sent in the zone mail messages and you know how infrequently I read them.
okay
who breaks up via e-mail anyway?
I always hate people who just post WOW!, but here I go doing just that. WOW!
Well Jess I see my board is still up. Chris there you go again! It was the Zone email! I always read mine! You are a controling homophobic person!
wait he hates homo sexuals? What does that have to do with the price of tea in China
oh my gosh. lol. this gets funnier and funnier. hehehe chris count your blessing that she ended it and move on. heheh
hmm. I seem to have read something somewhere on some other board, perhaps it was on a far plannet and univerce about boards dying? This would have to be right up there to deserve this board should dye awardd. heheheh
yeah, your not wrong about that one Cam. I get the feeling that, "it's only just begun" though. A smart cl would come and lock this board before they both start name bashing each other on this thred. That way, we all won't have to here about it. Sorry, but I for one really don't want to here all this crap about how he's a "controling homophobe" or whatever will come next. Yeah, I kno all about freedom of speech and stuff, but, sorry guys, enough is enough!
you don't
if you don't care about the topic no more just simply don't click on it
don't ruin the entertainment for the rest of us
if hereing people slag off at each other is entertaining for you, I love beer, then you really need to take a look at yourself. I mean, really, if it's that funny to you to laugh at someone being called something, wich they're not, then either you don't have any compassion at all for someones miss-fortune, or your a sick indevidual. Think about it, how would you feel if you were being called names or being accused of things that you kno aren't true in a public place like this? that goes for anyone who trys to tell me that it's "Hopes fault for starting this" or "Chris deserves it". No-one deserves to be called names of any! sort.
Oiy vey.
why did i read this again?
oh well, it's another post...
I got broken up with on msn once, is that better o worse than email??
I'm so gladi'm not in a zone relationship...
um, I'm thinking they're both the same, but msn would definitly be worse.
Louie I think it's the same. Izzie I won't ruin it for you! I told Dan aka Harp he could take it down on Friday! He said I didn't break any rules! Liz he is both! No I didn't call him names! Chris even told me he doesn't like those kind of people! It's a shame he feels this way! Sure I went about it in the wrong way! I shouldn't have made my last post here! I take full responsebility for that!
Can you use other punctuation marks at the end of your sentences, other than the stupid exclamation point? Gur'r'r.